UAC Roundtable: Experts Decry Dearth of Good Parenting and Decline in Societal Values

A good number of experts in child education, child’s rights and protection advocacy as well as family strengthening advocacy who attended a roundtable session organised by a Nigerian civil society group, United Action for Change(UAC) in Lagos on Saturday, have decried the dearth of good parenting in today’s society as well as the general decline of societal values.

In a roundtable session with the broad topic; “Parental Failure and Decline in Societal Values”, the discussants, which included, Yetunde Fashakin, a Consultant Psychiatrist, Clinician, Researcher, Teacher and Addiction Specialist; Aameenah Oluwatosin Yunus-Ali, a certified Performance Consultant and a Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP); Taiwo Akinlami, co-founder and CEO, Power Parenting Company LLC; Children’s Human Rights/Protection and Family Strenghtening Expert/Advocate and Saadat Ogunbote, an educationist, Child Advocate,Teen Coach and Counsellor, in their respective presentations unanimously agreed that, it is high time that the stakeholders at different levels came together to profer solutions to the lingering crisis of parental failure and dearth of societal values in the contemporary age.

Welcoming the participants to the event, the Convener of United Action for Change and the moderator of the session, Muiz Banire in his opening remarks said; “the organisation is very concerned about the ugly trend in the society, which was as a result of bad parenting and lackadaisical attitude of contemporary parents to the proper upbringing of their children. Hence, the need for the organization to call on everyone to come, reason together and look at formidable ways to save the society.”

In her lead discourse, Yetunde Fashakin who is also the Chief Execitive Officer (CEO)/Managing Director (MD), Amazing Health Care Clinic posited that; “the problem in the society is that we are less concerned about the future of our young ones. Meanwhile, we have forgotten that, when there are too many children out there without good parental care, those with two parentage are not even safe.”
According to her; “parental failure is inability of the parent to do the needful. You haven’t become a parent until you teach your child the right path. We must teach the children how to have vision, contentment, fear of God and fear of the country. Parents have the responsibility of guilding and guarding the children to adulthood. And we must inculcate inculcate godly conscience in the lives of the children. If you fail to scold your child when he or she is wrong is a sign of parental failure. Spare the child and spoil the child.”

Fashakin who is also a member, Child and Adolescent Psychiatrist, declared that; every child should be given specific attention, saying; “a parent will be making a mistake, if he or she is trying to fit all the children in the same mould. Every child is unique and they must be trained uniquely. Be deliberate about parenting, don’t leave your child upbringing to chance.”

In her presentation, Aameenah Oluwatosin Yunus-Ali decried the reality of today’s world. According to her,; “the reality has changed drastically, the sophistication of information technology has made the world to be overloaded with information that has adverse effects on the children. And it is saddening that we can only instruct or condemn so many things they are exposed to but we aren’t providing alternatives.”

Yunus-Ali, who is also an associate practitioner with the Institute of Family Systems Engineering and Development and a member of Family Systems Engineering Professionals however suggested that; “We need to recreate the society we want. And this starts with the family. We need to start having a vision statement for the family. And also the school your child attends must share the same value system you want to build for the child. Special attention must be placed on schooling. You must have a specific purpose of sending your child to a particular school. The school must have a vision and core values that are in accordance with your family value system and the future you aspire for your child.”

In the same vein, Taiwo Akinlami, who is a Parenting According to Social Protection Protagonist; reinforced the place of educational institution in training and raising of a child. According to him; “government must make a concerted effort in putting in place a policy that would ensure social protection of every child while in school.”

Speaking on effective raising of a child; Akinlami highlighted family , community, state and international community as four institutions that are responsible for raising a child saying in these; “the family remains the bedrock of the society and the number one rule is to inculcate positive value system into the children. On the other hand, the community, which include, the school, the religion organisations, NGOs, the media among others have the role to validate the family value system. It is sacrosanct that a child needs to be hearing the same voice from all of them. When a child begins to hear diverse messages from these insttitutions, a big problem sets in.”

Still emphasizing the place of “school” in raising a child; the fourth discussant, Saadat Ogunbote, who is also the initiator of Pearls Of Wisdom, a platform comprising parents, teachers, school owners and educational enthusiasts with the mission to inspire and sustain academic excellence in young minds said; “a school can make or mar a child. A parent must have a clear idea of the type of school he or she wants for his or her child. The family value system must determine such school. A lot of sanitisation must begin in our schools. The government must regulate establishment of private schools. We must begin to ask; Of what specific purpose are these schools? Who are the people establishing the schools? What is their vision?”

Lamenting the decadence in the society, Ogunbote said; “the society today is celebrating vices over virtues. Today, to the children, vices are the right things while virtues are the wrong ones. In this regard, the media needs to be sanitised, because it is having a great influence on our today’s world. The media pushes a lot at us, and these are the things dominating the world right now. The media should promote good content for the sake of the children and their future.”

In his closing remarks, the Secretary of the organization, Michael Popoola appreciated all the participants at the very interactive and highly resourceful event. He promised that the organization will ensure that everything discussed, like its tradition, would be presented to the appropriate authority.